Mommy meltdown...

I don't know if I'm hormonal or tired or anxious about going back to work or what, but yesterday was my first official mommy meltdown. I've had a couple of other minor stressful moments or times when I just didn't really feel in control, but yesterday I lost it. I'm sitting on the couch, feeding Milo, seeing the half basket of laundry that I did on Tuesday and still haven't put away, the dirty glass sitting on the table, the beer bottle over on the trunk, the stack of mail that just seems to keep building, then the cat threw up on the carpet right in front of me. And I just started to cry. I'm home all the time, but our apartment is never clean, I'm really only taking care of one infant, but he seems to suck all of my time. I love him dearly and wouldn't trade these days for anything, but I wonder how any mom gets anything really done during the day as he seems to demand most of my time. I'm getting better at the 5-10 minute tasks while he naps or sits in his baby catapult, but he's been a little crabby this week, and I feel like somehow I'm failing him because he's not the happy baby he's been. I'm sure he's fine, and I'm fine, just had a moment.

Mike came home, poured me a glass of wine, and whisked Milo out to Chaska to see Nana Steph. I worked on our bedroom disaster for a little bit, went to see a movie (why do I love seeing movies by myself; am I a hermit at heart?), and then met a couple of friends for happy hour at our new local spot. And today is a new day. Milo and I went to the post office and talked to Auntie Kate. And now he's oogling his baby gym and cooing happily. Maybe we've both turned a corner.