I met someone...

Yeah, not what you're thinking, but still pretty exciting. It's still awkward moving as an adult and trying to build a new network. Really having to put yourself out there, almost like you are dating, but dating to find friends. Which is both easier and worse all at the same time. With dating, at least if the person is a total dud, you can say something like, yeah this was fun, but it's just not working out, and probably never see them again. With friends, it's this weird, I'm needy but not too needy, I'm interesting but not self-involved, you need to sell yourself and check the other person out, and without being too selective as to close doors, but not ending up with a bunch of people who suck you dry of any social energy. And unlike dating, or at least dating when you're without child, you do want to try to find people of similar interests and commitments, ie parents, but that in and of itself is a challenge because you either meet them and get to know their life story in the 8.2 minutes your kid is willing to put up with you after library time, or you have to very deliberately put yourself in situations where these conversations might happen wherever you as adults choose to be, ie work, church, etc.

I haven't had great luck up to this point, but Milo was in fine form after Mother Goose Time at the library today, so we stayed and hung out for a couple of minutes. I struck up a conversation with another mom who also just moved to the area from out-of-state, who is also a stay-at-home mom, and who also does not seem crazy or annoying. We're heading to the zoo this weekend, so I mentioned where we were going, we exchanged emails and phone #s, and I think she might really be a friend. She even introduced me to another one of the moms at story time, and thus the networking begins.

It's so funny the thoughts that chase through my head in all of this: am I cool enough, am I a good enough friend that someone will be as excited about meeting me as I am about them, will we have enough in common to keep us going but be different enough so as not to be boring? Will our kids get along? Does that matter, or will we make them get along so we can hang out? How soon do I email her so as not to seem too desperate, but interested enough so that the newness of our meeting doesn't rub off? Did me not taking a shower this morning cause her to doubt my overall hygiene and thus ruin our chances to be kindred spirits? I think I'm a little paranoid. And in all reality, and maybe this is a sad statement of who I have become, but I really am so happy and feel so blessed with all the kindred spirits I've met in my many moves and travels, that I almost feel like I don't need any more. That I have a great many great friends, they just don't happen to be in Toledo. But as I'm here longer and Milo gets older, I think it's important to both of us to make connections and be social. And if not just for us, but for what we can offer, how we can help and serve. If nothing else, listening to the President last night reminds me to be involved, to be a part of a community that binds together, not isolates.